Getting Personal

Message Transcription

Begin this morning, our second week in this Lenten series called Lament, Repent and Anticipate with words of one of my favorite authors from one of my favorite books called The Divine Conspiracy. It's Dallas Willard's translation of Mark one, verse 15, Jesus Gospel Proclamation. He says this All the preliminaries have been taken care of and the rule of God is now accessible to everyone. Review your plans for living and base your life on this remarkable opportunity. Friends. That's what we're trying to do here in the season of Lent. As we take some time to prepare our hearts and our minds for the coming Easter Sunday to think about who God is calling us to be and challenge us to become. To do so, I want to invite you to consider. Have any of you ever been to Muir Woods, the Redwood Forest Coastal Redwood Forest out in Northern California? It's an amazing, amazing place. We went there last year, got to walk around this park. It's beautiful. These trees are amazing. They're the largest trees in the world, and they only grow in this one location in northern California, Southern Oregon, along the coast. That's the only place in the world that they grow. Some grow to be over 300ft tall, the tallest living thing in the world. Pretty amazing. Now, we walked around, spent a couple of hours just traversing all of the trails. We take some pictures here.

You can't really see us because I was trying to capture the enormity of the trees as we were walking around on our way out of the park. We also came across another rare finding. This, my friends, is called a phone booth. Harley just about passed it, didn't notice it in Muir Woods. What's interesting is you can't get cell signal now. The trees are so tall, the vegetation is so dense and thick that they can't get a signal. So if you happen to be one of those digital natives and you take an Uber out to Muir Woods, you can't take an Uber back home because you can't get cell service. So you have to actually use a phone. Gabe picked it up just to make sure it was still working and and it is. It's the only way to communicate with the outside world there. But the amazing thing we learned about these beautiful redwood trees, one of the things that we learn is if one of them falls, falls over, you kind of get a cross section of it. You begin to see the rings. Maybe some of you are familiar if you've ever seen a tree that's fallen, the rings on the tree, you know, those inner rings actually tell the story, the life story of that tree. In fact, we can learn an incredible amount of information by looking at the rings. We can tell, number one, how old the tree is.

We can tell if a particular year there was a lot of rain or not much we can tell if they were ever struck by lightning or if they ever encountered fire just by looking at the rings. There's something happening in the internal stories, not always shown by the outside context. You have to look at the inside. Each ring tells you something about the life of this particular tree. The inner rings tell the story, and it's true about us as well. We have inner rings, don't we? If we can take a cross-section of our life and begin to look at some of the rings that are around, some of us have a few rings that are starting to creep out onto our skin and they tell a story. Some of them might tell the story of of events that have happened in our life. Maybe it's a story of a toxic relationship that you were involved in in high school or college or your early married years. Maybe some of us. A ring might tell the story of an incredible life moment. That time you got that job you never thought you would get or that time that that God came through in a way that you hadn't quite expected. Maybe there's a ring that tells the time. Those words that were spoken to you that cut you and wounded you from someone you thought you could trust.

And maybe there's a ring in there that that reminds you of how you felt, loved and accepted. Only when you could perform. You could perform on the football field or in the gymnasium or on the stage or playing that instrument or getting that particular grade or into that kind of school or that kind of job, or maybe earning that amount of salary or driving that particular car or living in that particular neighborhood. Those rings would tell us a story. What do your rings say about you? What story do your rings tell you? You know, if we want to take this season of Lent and really learn what it means to grow and flourish in the kingdom in order to face the kind of temptations that Jesus faced and find success in them, we're going to have to learn how to examine and deal with our rings. Brené Brown, a famous writer, teacher, author, says If we don't own our story, then our story owns us. And isn't that so true? So true. I'm thankful to a man named Mike Brown. He's a preacher in Christian churches, one of our sister groups in the churches of Christ in our history. He's preached in Kentucky, in Las Vegas, in California. He did a series a few years ago that really impacted me. I'm so thankful. Much of what I have to share is due to some of the reflections I've had just by listening to him again this week as I was preparing for this message.

You know, going in a new direction means that we have to be willing to be honest to get personal about what's really going on inside of our lives that we're going to face, the temptations that come to us. We have to be honest about who we are and where we are and when we are and how we are. Have you ever had that experience? And Mitch, I hope you're not listening this morning. If so, I apologize on behalf of of those of us who have done this, but have you ever been driving in your car and you hear the car noise that, you know, it's just not right? That doesn't sound right. And so your solution is you just turn the radio up and just keep driving. And I don't have time to deal with this. I don't have the money to deal with this. I don't have the space to deal with this. We just keep on going. I got a call a couple of months ago from my daughter and she said, Dad, I'm at school and I'm in a parking lot and I can't go in reverse. And I said, We'll just put it in reverse. And she said, I have I put it in reverse. I hit the gas and nothing happens. And luckily, Mitch came to the rescue, helped push her car out.

We talked about it. He said, you need to take it to a transmission shop. I said, okay. So I take it over to this transmission shop and I tell them about the problem. And he says, Well, you know, here's a couple of things that you can do. Number one, you can keep driving the car. Just don't pull in headfirst anywhere. Just make sure you don't have to back up. You just keep going. And he said, in fact, a couple of years ago, I had a customer come in and he said, Well, I need you to fix my transmission. The reverse has gone out, the gear is busted, that no longer works. And he said, okay, well, how long have you been driving it this way? And he said, Well, about a year. A year and a half. Just been driving with no reverse. Right. Friends, Some of us have been driving with no reverse gear. And Lent is a season for us to say, Would you be willing to pull into the shop? To let not just a master carpenter, but a master mechanic open up the hood, diagnose the issue, and begin to work on bringing some healing, some grace into your life. You see the rings tell the story. And this is tough because we have to get personal. We have to get honest about what's really going on in our lives.

Rich Velotus, a famous writer, pastor, teacher, writes, wrote a book called The Deeply Formed Life, where he said Limited reflection leads to dangerous reactions. Some of you may be familiar with Rich's work. He says it's important that we become the kind of people who can reflect on the lives that we live, that we can get honest with God. And he says, when you're doing so, you want to keep in mind a couple of different categories, these three different groups, he says. There are patterns, there's trauma and there are scripts. Patterns are those repeated behaviors. Maybe they're practices or habits or even just ways of thinking that have been passed down to us from one generation to the next. Have you ever had this experience where you say something and as soon as it comes out of your mouth, you think, Oh, that was just like my dad. That was just like my mom. My dad's with me here today and there are many times where I'll say stuff or I'll look in the mirror and I go, Man, that is my dad looking right back at me, right? Many of us have a rich legacy of of lessons that we have learned, behaviors and patterns and relationships that we have carried down from our families. In fact, many of us, how many of us are here today because of a praying grandmother or grandfather or mother or father who passed on their faith, their faith, their legacy of faith to us.

Many of us have a rich legacy of patterns that we have received, but we also have some tough ones. Right? How many of us have that quick fuse? It just goes off in a second's notice from 0 to 60. How many of us have have had struggles because of conflict avoidance? And we learned you're not supposed to say that. You're not supposed to talk about that. You're not supposed to be around those people. We've received these other legacies. Maybe it's workaholism, maybe it's dishonesty. Some of us have received some of those patterns. Church Are we willing to stop and get honest and spend some time thinking, reflecting, allowing the Holy Spirit and God to come in and say, What's that ring telling you about your story? God, how can you change this ring in my life? Along with that, Rich says points to trauma. Now, trauma may be a more familiar word to us. We hear it a lot. What we know is whether trauma is big or small. We all have experienced some sort of trauma. Some of us have come some pretty difficult and challenging ways. Others of us, it's it's maybe not quite as challenging, but we've all experienced that those those traumas, those experiences, we can all point to episodes or circumstances or relationships that shaped us in some way, shape or form that are impacting our lives.

Are there ways that that we haven't come aware woken up to how that trauma is impacting us? That's one of the things that we can stop and examine and think about and invite the Holy Spirit. God, would you create some space in me? Would you help me to think back through some of those moments in my life that taught me something or or said something to me and now I'm having a hard time letting it go? It's an amazing thing can happen when you get around some trusted friends, some trusted, maybe a trusted counselor and began to to look at those rings on your tree and say, God, how has trauma shaped me? Has it formed the way that I look at the world, how I treat other people or don't treat other people? Yeah. Would you help teach me? You see, there are the patterns. There's trauma, but there are also scripts. Now, scripts are those roles that we pick up in our family. Maybe you didn't get handed a script? I certainly didn't. But I knew pretty early on what my role was in my family. I'm an Enneagram, number nine, and for those of you who know anything about that, I'm the peacemaker and I can be a really good thing. I'm the person I realize early on I didn't like conflict.

I wanted to make sure everybody got along. So when a weird thing happened on a show like this, intense conflict on a TV show, I changed the channel. Why? Because I don't need that stress in my life. I said, Everybody calm. Be still. Let's be nice. Play nice, right? That's an important thing. It's shaped every aspect of my life. It's shaped me as a father, as a husband. It's shaped me as a preacher and a pastor. It's shaped me as a therapist how I've spent my entire career trying to help people manage anxiety, deal with peace. All right. But when it's when it's off kilter, what happens is then I start to confuse being a peace maker with the peace bringer. And I forget we already have a prince of peace. That he has brought his peace into the world. And he's not asking me to create something where it isn't already. He's saying, Would you help make it available? Would you create space in your life that it might manifest itself in how you treat people and how you respond to crisis and anxiety? Would you allow me to work through you? Instead of thinking, Well, now it's my job to make sure everybody's okay. That's not my job. Are we willing to stop and look at that ring? That's a lot of the work I've been doing with my therapist the last couple of months is saying, all right, help me diagnose this ring because it's interfering in relationships.

Help me understand these patterns that I'm bringing into my world. Help me understand some of the trauma that I've experienced and how it's shaping me. Help me understand this role that I think I have and what I'm finding. It's actually cutting me off from the relationships, from the people that I care most about examining my inner world and my rings allow me and allow Jesus and the Holy Spirit to bring peace and healing, to bring challenge and encouragement. To say that there is a kingdom breaking through every day. And God has a role for me, uniquely for me. And if I'm willing, he will help me learn how to live it out in the world. But to do that work in this season of Lent, we've got to be willing to follow Jesus into the wilderness. You know, Jesus fasted from food for 40 days. That's a hard sentence to say. Fasted from food for 40 days. And so some of us are fasting from something this Lenten season to remind us of our dependence and our need to be open and honest and vulnerable before God. You know, the Psalms are a great place to go. They're a great place to go and hear God's people cry out to God with all kinds of emotions and feelings. We hear rage and anger and despair.

We hear love and joy and opportunity. It's an amazing place to look at and to read kind of the prayer book of the early church. Jackson Read for us just a couple of verses out of Psalm 139. I want to point us there this morning as we look at Psalm 139 and these words that we have. Lord, you have searched me and you know me. David's words crying out to God. You know, when I sit and when I rise, you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down. You are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue, you Lord know it completely. You hit me in behind and before and you lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. Where can I go from your spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there. If I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn. If I settle on the far side of the sea. Even there your hand will guide me. And your right hand will hold me fast. If I say surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me. Even the darkness will not be dark to you. The night will shine like the day for darkness is as light to you.

You know, David pouring out his heart, recognizes God's presence with him. No matter what he faces, no matter where he finds himself, no matter what challenge or opportunity he encounters, God is present with him there, so much so that he says, God, would you help me examine my rings? God, would you search me? And would you know me? Would you know my heart and test me? Know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me. And lead me into the way Everlasting. God. Do you see any patterns, any trauma, any scripts that I need to encounter that I need to spend some time thinking about? God, do you see any ways that I'm mismanaging my emotions? Do you see any ways that I'm mismanaging my relationships or my time or my schedule? God, could you. Could you help me evaluate my rings? Got. Are there any ways that I'm ignoring or pretending or managing? That's the kind of work that can happen in the wilderness if we're willing this Lenten season to be open and honest and vulnerable before the Lord. One other lesson we learn from these majestic coastal redwoods. They have a shallow root system, which is kind of interesting. These enormous trees that go grow over 300ft tall. Their roots only go about 5 or 6ft deep in the soil, but they extend out and to begin to interweave with the trees around them.

In fact, if we could just take a cross-section, you see kind of a picture of a diagram and look at how these trees exist. They exist. In fact, many of their roots have grown over together. And what we find is that when strong winds blow and when the heavy rains and the flooding comes, they're able to stand tall to keep pointing toward their creator in heaven because they're connected. Friend Do you think there's a lesson for us in that today? That not only do we need to learn to examine our rings, we need to broaden extend our roots. I mean, how many of us have learned that lesson coming out of a pandemic where we were forced into isolation, we were forced out of relationships, out of our normal connectedness and how hard it has been for some folks to to manage that, to work through that. The numbers of depression and anxiety in our young people have skyrocketed. Why? Because we were forced to disconnect, to interweave the to break those connections. What we find, even in the beauty of nature, is for us to soar, to flourish, to grow to the person that God wants us to become. We have to learn how to interweave our roots. We have to grow roots in Christian community. You see, that's because God created us that way.

He created us to be connected, to be in relationships. You know, maybe some of you have grown up and heard this pattern or this thought or this trauma. Never let anyone know what's really going on inside. If they really knew the real you, they wouldn't want you. They wouldn't like you. Well, you've heard me say this before. If you knew about me, what God knew about me, you wouldn't be here today. But if I knew about you. What God knows about you, I wouldn't have let you in the door anyway. There's something powerful about a God who says I know you. I created you. I love you. You are mine. That you don't have to just present the Instagram story of your life, the curated version of all the happy moments. That that's not reality, that you don't have to just suck it up or stuff it down or throw some dirt on it or be strong or be independent or don't trust anyone or look out for number one. That God says No, no, no, no, no, no. That is not how you grow healthy and strong. Instead, we have to extend our roots to live a different way. Paul to the church in Ephesus would say it this way, and I pray that you being rooted. And established in love. That you may have power together with all of the Lord's people together in community, that it's not just for you, it's it's for everyone that you would grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ.

And to know this love that surpasses knowledge that you would be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Well says, My hope is that you'll be rooted in the love of God and that rooting in there is rooting in community. They would spread out and intertwine your roots, your lives into the roots and lives of others supporting and being vulnerable and listening and being listened to and serving and being served and loving and being loved, encouraging and being encouraged. When I think about this red wood root system, I think of some of the friends and and brothers in my life I got to spend a couple of weeks ago, I got to spend some time with one of my root intertwines who knows me and he doesn't let me get away with stuff. He doesn't let me play the victim card. He calls me out and he holds me accountable. But he also challenges me and he sees my giftedness and he says, Don't quit. Don't give up, keep going. God has a plan. He has a role. He has work for you to do. And these this family that that we've gathered around with my dad as we navigated most difficult, challenging time in our family to say we love each other, we're going to keep holding each other up.

And when one of us is struggling and doubting and wondering, the others come alongside and say, We remember, remember, remember, we love you. I. There's something powerful about a life filled with relationships. Who is in your life? Church Who is your root system? How are you investing in those relationships that will strengthen you? That will keep you standing strong when those storms come, because, friends, those storms are coming, if they haven't already. Who will help you? Preacher of Ecclesiastes said it like this, though 1st May be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not easily broken. So church, how is your root system? Maybe that's some of the work God's inviting you in to consider this Lenten season, not only assessing and diagnosing and looking at your roots, but your rings, but rather how is God inviting you to grow your roots? It's amazing how most of us are like the rest of us, right? Sometimes we think, well, if they really knew, if they just. If they understood me. The truth is, most of us are like the rest of us. We all are longing for people who could know us and love us, who will love us unconditionally. Because that kind of power, that kind of love is life changing. Jesus says, Would you follow me into the wilderness? The do little work on the rings.

To do a little work.

On the roots. In order to find the freedom that we long for, we're going to have to step into the light. We're going to have to come clean. This is some of the most challenging work. This is why I called the message getting personal, because it's going to require us to get personal, to be open and honest. Jesus own brother James said it like this. Therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. Know, this idea of confessing, gathering around some trusted friends who will know us and love us and encourage us. Is recognizing that holding on to that sin is not the pathway to healing. Instead, it's it's the pathway to more hurt. So church, can we can we be honest with each other? Can we learn to get vulnerable? Can we look for some ways to grow? To assess how our roots and how our rings are doing and take our next step. One of our favorite ministries here at Broadway is called Celebrate Recovery. That's what they're all about. Or maybe you want to join one of our small groups where we get a chance to just gather around a smaller group of people and be real to be the real you. Maybe you want to join another one of our Christian communities here at Broadway. We'd love to help you take your next step into that kind of life.

To get into community For folks who know who you are and they know where you've been, they've been there, many of them themselves. The challenges that you face, we'd love to help you take that next step. God, as we think about the rings in our lives, we can't help but think about those stories. The scripts, the patterns, the trauma, how they've impacted us. And got some ways they've they've been a wonderful gift handed down from generation to generation. It's kind of made us who we are. God, we're thankful for Christian brothers and sisters for centuries who have been loving and serving and forgiving and healing and offering grace and forgiveness in your name. Who have been extending the kingdom? God, we're here today as a direct result of their ministry. Their faithfulness. God, thank you for that legacy. I got some of us. We've received some other more challenging legacies, some patterns that have taught us we're not enough and we'll never be enough. Some hurts that that have wounded us in deep ways that have caused us not to want to trust, not to be open, not to be vulnerable. Some scripts that want us to pretend to be something that we're not or try to fill in whatever role we think is required of us rather than than being who you've created us to be. Now, Father, I pray that this season, this journey through Lent, we might have the courage.

To take a look at our rings and our roots, too, to allow you, Jesus, to open the hood. I God, we wouldn't just crank up the music and keep driving, but instead we would. We'd slow down and be still. Yeah. For that to happen, we're going to have to be surrounded by people we love and we trust the Lord. Would you help us? Help us to see those people. Help us to encounter those people. Yeah, some of us may want to spend some time with a Christian counselor or therapist to kind of sort through some things to begin making sense of some things. Lord, I know I've needed that in my life. It's been such a blessing. God, would you give us courage? If that's us, would you help us to take the next step in that direction? We'd love to help connect connect them to a counselor. Not for others of us. We just need to start practicing some of the habits that we've let slide. How would you help us to reengage those behaviors again? God, wherever it is, we're on our journey. I pray that today. That we like. David would hear that there is no place too far to run. There's no darkness too dark that your light can't shine into. There is no relationship to broken that you can't bring healing.

God, would you give us the courage?

Would you give us the courage to take that next step? Got sometimes that's a really hard, hard step. A step into safety. God, if we're in a dangerous relationship, to step out and to get safe.

To open up.

The light, the windows to shine light into the situation. God, would you give us courage?

Or maybe it's to set that appointment with that doctor to to deal with that issue that we just have been avoiding and avoiding. God, would you help us?

So take a look at cross section of our life and see those rings. And what they tell us. Yet so many of us, myself included, kind of bought this, this idea that we have to show up to church and everything's okay. How are you doing? I'm fine. It's okay. The outside doesn't tell the full story. God, would you help us to be real with one another? Yeah. Thank you again for your amazing love.

That's been poured out into our lives. For the grace and the forgiveness that flows so freely. Would you encounter us with it again today?

Father, help us. We pray in Jesus name. Amen.